Being a Mother

I’m not sure what’s going on with me, but I’ve been thinking a ton lately about being a mother. I mean, I’ve been a mom for 16 years now, and I have never been one to overthink it; I just do it. But, with Vincent turning 15 this past Sunday, for some reason I’ve been thinking about it a ton these days. Here’s the main thought that goes through my head: I only have three more years with Vincent under my roof. I have limited time wherein my reach might meet him. It’s not like I believe I can make him a certain way, but my time of influence with my son is definitely fleeting. I recently took a personality test. One of the questions focused on the character trait of intelligence verses kindness. I most definitely, strongly answered that I want my children to be kind over smart. I’ve always felt that. Now with three years to go, I’m bustlin’ my mommy buns to make sure I can raise a gentlemen. These have been my thoughts on being a mother lately. But there’s more….

Thinking about being a mother has always left me in thoughts about how I am being a daughter. I’m guilty of not being very good. I should write home more, call home more, reach out more. Over the weekend Kevin made a phone call home to his mom. First I thought, “Gosh, I hope my son calls home when he does move away.” Then, I was left with such guilt because I don’t call home very often. So being a mother has left me realizing I need to be a daughter–a good one. Ironically, yes it is Mother’s Day this weekend, but all these overly deep thoughts on mothering, they are being brought on by the two men in my life. My husband who is very dear to his mum all the time, and my son whom I hope very much takes after his father. And as for me, I need to do better and reach out to my mom–Mother’s Day or not!!

These pictures were taken during our spring break trip to Bohol, Philippines, and there’s really no correlation between these pictures and my thoughts on being a mother. Yet, in the above picture, I especially feel like I look so much like my mom. It’s like I’m identical to her or something. And then lately, the way I interact with strangers, wanting to know more about them and reaching out to make connections with people, I’m reminded again of my mother. She’s just like that making friends with the cashier at the super market or the seat neighbor on a plane. I’m a lot like my mom–both in looks and demeanor. It’s time I embrace these similarities and take pride in them especially since I admire my mom—A LOT!

(By the way…. since I attempt to fashiong blog over here on Kremb de la Kremb, I’ll offer some details on what I’m wearing. This $15 dress was perfect for sunsets on the beach. I highly recommend it because for the price, it’s a real winner–plus wearing white after a day in the sun is always a complimentary look. I was quite happy with this lippy (Cannes lip matte by NYX) that I brought–again it was the perfect shade for after a day in the sun. Finally, my earrings were a total score in one of my favorite shops in the New Delhi airport. I went back to get them because I couldn’t stop thinking about them. They remind me of something Kelly Framel, The Glamourai, would wear, and she’s just the coolest of all cool. And finally, because all the best flip flops are found in beach markets, the pair I’m wearing were picked up in Bohol’s little beach town. There’s my style update for this memorable sunset night!)

*This post has been linked up to Not Dressed As Lamb’s #iwillwearwhatilike.

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  • You look beautiful in these photos, Ann. Very relaxed 🙂
    I can’t really comment on what it’s like being a mother because it never happened for me. We tried for years but then just accepted it wasn’t meant to be. I can’t even comment on my own mother either because she died when I was very young. The one thing I would say is yes, call home more often because you just never know how much time is left to tell the ones you love how much you really love them <3
    Suzy xx

    • Gosh Suzy. I want you to know I just got off the phone with my folks. I’ll try to call home more often, and I told them as much. I just figured out a good time too with the time difference and all. I should just make an appointment for myself; then for sure it will happen way more often if it’s already planned. In fact, that’s what I’m going to do.

      Thank you for opening up to me in your comment Suzy. Your life story is very amazing.

      Much love, (and happy Mother’s Day regardless because I know you offer motherly love to people in your life),


  • Judy Gramith

    What a perfect post to commemorate motherhood. Like the previous commentor I also did not have children but you’re aware that teaching middle school for 37 years made me the mom of many and that’s the vibe I cultivated and loved with students.
    Although I think you have and will continue to encourage your children to be kind you know that your role as a model of that behavior is HUGE in passing on those precious traits. I also believe that how your husband treats his mother will have a very dynamic impact on how Vincent treats you in the future and how he treats an eventual life partner.
    Definitely reconnect more attentively to your folks Ann. All of your mothers virtues that have become part of you are also part of the legacy passed to your son and daughter. You’ve done a good job. You look beautiful in your white dress, sun burned nose and your mother’s eyes.
    Happy Mother’s Day Ann.

    • Yes, you are so much a mom to so many people Jude. I mean, you are not necessarily a mom to me, but the care you give me feels so kind and generous. You support me so much, and I always hope I’m able to convey how much I appreciate it!

      I did call home too! It felt good to talk to my folks. Now I’m going to set a reminder to call home next week–same day, same time. I’ll just make it a habit!!!

      I’m excited to see them in about 6 weeks too. I’ve already invited them to the first night out at the cabin; I do hope they come!

      Thank you Jude. Big hug to you this Sunday!!

      Love, Annie